🦋 It's Raihana & no one else 🦋

 27 sept 2021; lagi 2 hari nak bday 2 onyet favourite saya HAHAHAHAHA. sekarang dah pukul 2.59 am, and I feel so fresh sbb baru jek bangun, dah tidur dah lepas isyak tadi hehehe.  shall we start the entry-  so I just woke up from my deep sleep, I went ahead open up my phone just like everyone else does hahahaha and read all messages. I don't know why but my what'sapp is always filled with new messages EVERY SINGLE MINUTE. I suddenly remembered my room mate said that " Raihana is a businessman whenever she wakes up, always with her phone replying all questions and hells there. "  😂😂😂😂😂 however that doesn't really matter, but I stopped at Farina's text that she sent me a name list of our groupings for orientation week- Yep, we are currently on orientation for our degree and I've never felt this indifferent and reluctant. despite the event is fully held online, I still force my little mind to work on a plan to escape all these. contrary to when I was in ...

  that little smile in your eyes sparks a burning flame inside me that could light up the whole world -R,19;  let it not  burn me when it is hot

  heart is where the sky  can be dined as we watch the stars  starting to aligned then the love dance gracefully in between -R,19

  take a peek from the little window of my eyes and thou will see the moon that looked so much like thee -R, 19; 20th September.

  like the whole universe you are a blessing that you grow flowers from running tears - R, 19; you are something.. to die for. 

  don't cage me in your heart free me in your prayers  may this wings of mine know how to fly back to its dear - R, 19, home is where the heart is.

  I heard your whispers to heaven asking God about me imagine if I declined the call how embarrassed I will be - R, 19; we both know who we are ;)

jum'ah barakah, 17th September 2021 - the day after tomorrow will be Zuzu's birthday. while yesterday was her love life's, Tengku Hassanal Ibrahim Alam Shah of Pahang. 😝 it's nearly 2 weeks since I got my degree offer letter, YESSSS ALHAMDULILLAH HAHAHAHA I finally got invited to experience another 4-days-straight of sleepless nights (looking for a longer period 💓), another more days to puasa suddenly (submission days are always exhausting that I'll fall asleep right after the deadline until maghrib XD) and to more and more of rejection and "BURUKKKK" from mon lecturers 😄 (since i wasn't born to draw but i WILL in shaa allah, we'll see 😏). if you followed my previous story about me being so dramatic about what i want to pursue in degree,  i mentioned that i wanted to go for QUANTITY SURVEYING so so bad. -definitely a decision to make after my ideas got rejected so many times, i was compared to other people a lot (direct & indirect way) and ...

  careful with your word for it swings like a sword thou may smile how the blade cuts me I may laugh how its philosophy breaks thee. - R, 19; for beneath is scarier

4 sept 2021, sat.  3 hours left before my birthday: honestly, as I grow up, the excitement of celebrating birthday started to fade slowly and instead of hoping for scrumptious birthday cake from my loved ones, I'll take my 1st step to spend my money on them. wouldn't that be better, to spend on something that can last be a man's mudghah?  last year, I spent my birthday at campus and how pathetic that I didn't really make friends with anybody else because we just enrolled the campus on the early August- so what to expect in just a month to have somebody wishing for you? hence I just bought some waffles using my money (yea I looked so lonely hahahaha) and then distribute it to my close fellas. also, I got some sweet wishes via social medias and that's how last year went. this year, I was planning to just order something from KFC for I've been craving this since I was in campus. plus, my mum and I just finished rearrange the furniture in our rooms thus there's ...

  from your tyranny I learnt mercy from you ignorance I learnt concern stay this bitter, my dear and I will forever  be here remain stranger -R, 19, we do it you way

 yolo it's already day 3 of me not updating anything on my what'sapp, I used to make status every single day, just to you know, to inform my loved ones about my condition, share the things I do etc etc. I don't know but I kinda started to feel like I lost myself just to please other people. mana tak nya, I myself genuinely express my big heart yet some of them take this for granted.  Even more disgusting is when I feel judged, ill-watched & envied. yo, I don't usually do this to all people except for my close friends so be sure to count you blessing to be in my circle.  i know taking advices from our surroundings is good thing but it's not a good thing man to be asked to be somebody else. oh well, I don't really love to talk much because we've known enough how people these days hate reading.  actually I just want to write here that my birthday will be on this Sunday so I wonder does my crush knows about it or maybe... is he going to do something spectacu...