genuine, a poem

"I will be here..."

said the moon

you are always up there, mister

and yet

between us

not anything near

-R, 19; stepping the reality

*disclaimer: you might not really get the meaning of not anything near in stanza 2; well, to make it clear a bit, usually we say 2 km far, 5 meters apart, 1000 light years etc. but in this poem, it wants to express that there's no specific measurements for the distance between the persona and the mr moon, alias TOO FAR that it can't even be measured!

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Secantik mahkluk, puisi.

JANTUNGKU BAGAI TERHENTI SEKETIKA MELIHAT BAYANGANNYA SIAPAKAH LELAKI INI? KURNIAAN TUHAN DARI SYURGA? FIKIRKU SEJENAK HATIKU MERONTA MAHUKU DIA DISINI NAMUN PANTASNYA HANYA DICAKRAWALA BAGAIMANA BISA AKU MENDAKAPNYA ERAT LAGI KALAU BUKAN DARI DALAM HATI - R, 19, dekat tapi jauh :)

jejaka di pejabat sekolah.

tadi saya dgn kawan saya Fatimah nak pergi bilik guru lelaki. bilik guru tu bersebelahan dgn pejabat sekolah. saya & kwn saya nak hantar kerja kayu khb. saya buat tabung. masa nak masuk tu, tiba2 cikgu khb kitaorg masuk pejabat. jadi saya dgn fatimah pun nak masuk pejabat. tiba2 terperasan ada org lelaki ni HANDSOME 😍. dia pakai baju putih so means dia Pengawas / Prefect. dia pakai kopiah putih. muka dia putih, hidung dia mancung. ahh, saya dh tak boleh describe dh. susah. 😂 saya dgn fatimah cpt2 tunggu dekat depan bilil pengetua. semasa lelaki itu keluar, saya dan fatimah sampat melihatnya dari belakang. saya dan fatimah rasa dia adalah org yg PALING handsome dekat sekolah. dia mungkin atas saya. mungkin form 3 atau form 4. yg pasti bukan form 2. ok lah. sampai sini saja. saya berharap saya dpt jumpa dia lagi.

Bilik Kaunseling 😷

Ada seorang remaja perempuan yang duduk disebelah saya di dalam kelas. nama diberi, Suhada. 😂 Masatu Suhada & dr. Al Fadhil Fadhilah Adliah pergi bilik kaunseling. 😆 nak jumpa cikgu sapa ntah 💁 yang pasti, BUKAN cekgu kaunseling. Lepastu Arina ternampak Suhada dalam bilik kaunseling, dia dh nak keluar tapi malu2 macam tgk kiri kanan, lepastu tutup pintu. 😅😆 Arina pun tanya... kenapa... jawapan dia... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAABAB 😂😂😂😂😂😂 " AKU TAKUT NANTI ORG INGAT AKU KENA PANGGIL DENGAN CIKGU KAUNSELING. 😆😆😆 SEBAB TU AKU TAKUT NAK KELUAR.. " 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 January, 2017 winner. 😆😆😆 ok bai. 8 jan 2017, 2.39 pm, sundayy

Table for two, poem

I am just the size of Eve Little, weak and somewhat unclear Only a room for a heart A room for laugter And two for tears But the day you were in front of my eyes this universe inside me Growing horizonless And just then i realise How this love in this body is countless. - No boundaries, limitless of self rise until paradise. R, 18.

Insecurity-

27th June 2022. So I have this little secret I hid, deepest in my heart; Something of its truth I won't admit, but poison is never meant to be kept. - My insecurity. For all these years of living, it's quite shocking to say that I have been thinking of suicide so much for this semester. Nobody knows, how hard for me to cope with everything, and it's even funnier when people described me as "problemless" - quite a compliment for me for being hell good at camouflaging the flaws. There were times I wished to be killed during my sleep, for somebody to suddenly come and stab my back during my prayer. I sometimes lusted to fall sick and to have the most beastly disease on earth and die. I just hate of living. I don't want to meet anyone. I have no idea where of all these are coming from, I did everything - from turning on the Ruqyah for myself, to have some emails from Malaysian government of mental health careline.. I even had spilling session with somewhat ...

Called her mine.

22nd August 2023 She was somehow a Lebanese.. perhaps an Arab.. whose kind soul was the warmth of the friendship between my family and her. Her husband, was caught dead while protecting the country, he was a brave, fine soldier. And this woman, she had that big eyes and a pointy nose. Her hair was nearly curl and it is in light brown. She was a doctor and somehow people are so greed for heaven that they got her killed. In that dream, she was a good friend of mine. " You take her! " was her last word to me, for her first born. The little angel was just born and knew nothing. Not even she could recognize her mother. So I called her mine.. That time was as if I am an independent adult, alone, and ready to spend my life for the little girl. I brought her everywhere and taught her to laugh. She has that bright, big smile and that cheeks, light pink shades whenever she sees me. Her eyes blue and, she is mine. I remember...

🦋 It's Raihana & no one else 🦋

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